Two years ago I made my first memory quilt out of my old t-shirts. It was also the last time I would even think about making a t-shirt quilt because I struggled so much with the execution. Cotton jersey is a nightmare to sew, even on the machine. My hands didn't want to cooperate so I couldn't do as much embroidery as I wanted to (that was the very first time arthritis kept me from quilting, I think.) The fact that it's become one of my favorite quilts does not tempt me to revisit the experience.
I also know I couldn't make this quilt now (or it would take me a year or two.) The old me struggled with the making; the present me would not even try. I can barely hold a needle anymore. So I crochet, and I tell myself that's a reasonable substitution because what else can I do?
I crochet well. I crochet a lot. Still, I miss quilting. And I hate that I miss quilting. And then I miss quilting and the me who could do it even more. And then I hate myself a little more.
I've been trying so many ways to get back into quilting -- to force myself to use the machine and give up hand stitching, really -- that it's become a bit of a personal drama I'm having with myself. I need a reset that will allow me to do what I'm capable of while still quilting in a way that makes me as happy as the old hand stitching did. It should be simple and practical but still produce quilted work in a reasonable amount of time.
I'm going to work on this by testing a few ideas during my vacation, and see what I can do to get back a little of the old me.
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I shift the way I do things. It annoys me, but at least it doesn't stop me.