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Remembering This

We planted a Duncan grapefruit tree yesterday on our back property as my last Mother's Day gift for my mom. It's also what I prefer to do to honor the memory of those I've loved and lost. We bought an Valencia orange tree for my dad as well, so it can keep Mom's tree company.

Some good news: my kid got a job with the U.S. Geological Survey testing water sources in the Pacific northwest for invasive species. She leaves in a couple weeks, and we probably won't see her again until Christmas. It's a wonderful opportunity for her to be a field scientist and pursue her dreams of helping to solve some of the problems with the environment.

I've been feeling frozen for the last couple of months. Depression, my health issues, the feeling every time I go to bed that I might not wake up in the morning -- it's hard to live that way and feel hopeful and happy. I'm a problem solver with problems I can't solve. My paralysis has been equal parts frustration and exhaustion.

Losing Mom hurt, but it made me remember that we all have a limited time here. If my time is running out, then I need to live the best life I can now however I can. I hope then when it's my time that I'll have no regrets, and go with a happy heart.

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nightsmusic said…
I love the trees. What a wonderful way to honor your parents. And congrats to Kat! That is, to use an overused word, awesome! I wish her all the best.

I understand the depression. I've spent a large part my life, when my depression rears its ugly head, afraid to close my eyes at night for fear I'll never open them again. I finally realized no one knows the number of their days and I can choose to be happy and live, or sit in the dark and shrivel. Some days are harder than others, but I choose to live. So live every day. Just live. I love ya.
May 10, 2021 at 5:22 PM
the author said…
Love you too, my friend.

Just living the best way we can is enough.
May 10, 2021 at 7:10 PM
Maria Zannini said…
That's a wonderful way to remember them. A positive legacy.

We've had a recent death too, Greg's best friend, more like a brother than a friend. It hit Greg especially hard. We've been going through photo albums and reminiscing to give him some happy memories of his brother.

re: Kat
I knew she'd get it! Good for her!
May 11, 2021 at 4:01 AM
the author said…
I'm so sorry to hear about Greg's friend. Give your guy a hug for me, pal.

I'm sad that Kat has to go so far away, but I'm beyond happy she got a job in her field. This is the beginning of great things for her, I think.
May 11, 2021 at 8:17 AM
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