It's that gift-giving whether you like it or not time of year again, so here are:
Ten Things I Don't Want for Christmas
Booze: We don't drink, and have not for the last thirty years. I do not provide alcohol for guests or allow them to bring it into my house. I don't regift unwanted booze. I have one half-bottle of white cooking wine that I use to make Bistec de Palomilla (Cuban steak with onions), by the way, and I'm not going to let you drink that, either.
Candy: Did you know there is no cure for diabetes, and that I still have it? Yep. I'm also back on the meds to control my blood sugar. Please notice these things.
Cookbooks: I own about fifty now, including all the really good ones for diabetics and vegans. I've also run out of space on the cooking bookcase, to which some of my sewing stuff has migrated. It's also not a very subtle hint. If you want me to feed you, just ask, but don't passively-aggressively whine about my average cooking skills.
Diamond Painting Kit: I have too many mean things to say about diamond painting, which is like paint-by-number but with tiny bits of plastic. It was a trend, I tried it once, and never again. Tell you what, when they start putting actual diamonds in the kits, then get me one.
Dog-decorated Things: Yes, I love dogs (and all animals, as it happens.) The puppies have added greatly to my daily happiness. That said, I have never liked wearing clothing decorated with the images of any type of pet. Plain, solid-color clothes are my idea of a fashion statement. So step away from the Sheltie socks, please.
Hair Salon Gift Card: The last time I got my hair cut in a salon the lady kept touching my hands, my shoulders, my face and then wanted to put makeup on me (probably to sell me some.) I don't wear make up and I seriously hate being touched by strangers. So now my guy cuts my hair, and (unless it's good in Hawaii) I have no one else I can give the card to anymore.
Latchhook Anything: I made one small art rug about twenty years ago, which cured me of ever ever ever wanting to pick up a latchhook again. I've never done something as tedious (except maybe Diamond Painting.) Please just buy me a storebought rug if you think I need one.
Scented Candles: These days my short term memory is a bit blippy. One time I actually left the house to run errands with one still lit in the guest bathroom. I like them, but I really can't be trusted with them anymore.
Slippers: I have duck feet, so most of them end up squashing my toes. I prefer socks, and I own a million pairs, so no socks, either.
Yarn: I have picked up crocheting again in hopes of keeping somewhat limber the three fingers on my right hand that still work. Yet I still have enough yarn to keep me busy until they stop working altogether, thanks.
Comments
re: gifts
I cannot abide anything scented. Like my hearing, my sense of smell is acute. Even a pleasant smell can give me a raging headache if it's too strong.
I had to laugh about the socks. I love comical socks. People think I'm crazy when I ask for socks for Christmas, but I'm totally serious.